| found my way here after years. |
[Nov. 10th, 2009|09:00 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "Seattle," House of Cards | ] |
Tonight, Virginia is scheduled to execute John Allen Muhammad, the elder of the two snipers. Yida recently put a whole bunch of photos from that year up on the facebook. High school was so long ago.
School is still going very well. I still love what I'm learning and who I'm learning with. I have a lot of plans just in the next couple of days, what with Veterans Day off. Bell in Hand downtown tonight, brunch and ice cream and dinner party tomorrow. I've had three visitors in as many weekends. KPo was here over Halloween to see the Divinity School (and party), and Ross came up from New York last weekend for a lecture series (and to catch up after two years apart). I'm behind on reading and writing, but I'll catch up; I always do. I'm ridiculously behind on my e-mails, but I'll catch up; sorry, friends!
This weekend, I'm flying out to Seattle to see Dan, now officially my boyfriend. He already has tickets to come out to Boston and DC over the holiday season, and I'm applying for summer hospital internships in Seattle.
It all seems too easy, like it can't really be happening. Like it's not fair, not possible, for life to be this good. But, here we are. |
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| Transfer |
[Nov. 9th, 2009|05:12 pm] |
So I was having another discussion with Kevin about how much I hate CMU, and he brought up the idea of transferring if I'm so unhappy here, which I haven't really seriously considered since my freshman year/early sophomore year, because I assumed it was one of those first-semester freshman things, either you get out early or you're screwed. He told me that junior year transfers are actually pretty common and it's actually a good time to do them because usually programs hit their enrollment peek around the freshman/sophomore years, and most likely a lot of my credits would transfer over. The first idea he suggested was transferring to Pitt, which actually sounds kind of cool to me. I mean their engineering program decent and I have a chance of actually doing well in it, like how I had a high GPA in high school, and I'd probably be surrounded by people I actually get along with. Of course there are probably other colleges like this, where I'd definitely be happier, but that's the first idea that popped into my head.
I'm also hesitant about this because there really aren't many engineering courses I need to take to graduate. I mean I could just suck it up and get through the program, feeling average/inadequate upon graduation, or transfer, stay a bit longer, and have some sense of self-worth upon graduation. |
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| The Mentalist |
[Nov. 9th, 2009|08:25 pm] |
Totally watching The Menalist 2x06 (where Jane goes in prison! :D) AND OMFG! HE LOOKS SO FAT IN THE INMATE CLOTHES!! XD It takes all the sexyness from the suit away! =O |
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| Since Twitter is too brief an outlet |
[Nov. 9th, 2009|01:19 am] |
Last Monday night, I fell apart. I got drunk on tequila and I sobbed for more than half an hour. My friends had to take me home. They had to hold me up and remind me I wasn't the worthless, disgusting, unattractive waste of air that I felt like I was.
One person told me, after that night, that I must certainly have a powerful effect on people, that I had that many people who wanted to take care of me. But you know what I have to say? I was a mess. I was clearly not able to take care of myself at that moment. They are my friends, and they're human, so what else could they do? They held me up, walked me home, and cared for me because I was once again stupid and needy.
For more than a month, I have been nothing more than a needy, selfish, self-centered pile of shit. I keep falling apart and getting depressed and I don't know how to do anything else.
So what are these friends around me to do but remind me that I am a good person, and a good friend to them, and good at the things I do, and in all other ways just take care of me? For a month, I have made it clear to everyone around me that I can't take care of myself and I am a leech who takes from them because I can't survive on my own.
So here's yet another group of friends who tell me they love me and tell me I'm a wonderful friend. Here's another group of people who I have surrounded myself with, convincing myself that I matter to some people, convincing myself that I'm actually worth more than the air I take up. Here's another poor group of individuals who tell me that I light up rooms when I come in and that I fix problems and that I am compassionate and caring.
But where do they all go? When we separate, suddenly this group of people who felt like I could be so important to them disappear. Not completely, for I still get to see Twitters and Facebooks and hang onto their phone numbers and screen names like I could one day use it and pretend like I'm still worth something to them. But instead, I sit on AIM and look at my buddy list at all the friends from my past and watch as they think of nothing to say to me. And who am I to butt in where I'm not wanted and actually make them pretend they still think about me.
I can't imagine how much energy it must take to be my friend. I wholeheartedly apologize to everyone who has had to deal with me.
If only I knew how to shut off my feelings. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 7th, 2009|04:45 pm] |
05. The Strokes
02. Katie Mcgrath
04. Merlin (Morgana & Arthur/Morgana)
01. Ed/Leighton
15. Gossip Girl
05. Harry Potter (Hermione & Ron/Hermione)
Teaser:
  
Here
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| “Love?” (Pairing: Hr/R, Rating: G) |
[Nov. 7th, 2009|03:57 am] |
Title: “Love?”
Author(s): ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) natygry
Chapter(s): 1
Status: Completed
Word Count: 3428
Genre(s): Fluff, Friendship, General, PWP, Romance, Trio
Character(s): Hermione & Ron, Harry and the Weasleys
Pairing(s): Hermione & Ron
Rating: G
Time Period: Post-War, Pre-Epilogue
Warning(s): DH Spoilers
Summary: The war is over, but the Wizarding world and the Weasley family are thoroughly shaken in its wake.
Harry is looking for signs that things will be good again wherever he can.
Then Ron, suddenly, does something that shifts things and transforms the way they will be from now on.
Author’s Note: I am immensely proud and honoured to announce that this story was picked as one of the Quarterly Featured Stories at The Quidditch Pitch! *squeals*
Check out the other featured stories here at The ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) Captains' Pitch and thesteppyone’s lovely banner bellow.
Thank you, Captains!
Love, NatyGry! |
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| Damn |
[Nov. 6th, 2009|02:49 pm] |
Well I planned on going to Pegasus sometime in late December/January to celebrate the fact that my stalker [who goes there every weekend] will no longer be in Pittsburgh (if my calculations are correct. Culinary Institute program is 16 months and this is from August, so he SHOULD be out of here)...
But Pegasus closes on Dec. 6th. Which kind of sucks because I thought that place was pretty cool before I became lame and old. But also that means I have about a 2/15 chance (yes, I did the math) of going before it closes.
Then again, I might just go anyways.
But apparently I'm turning 21 in 4 months, so in the event that I stop being lame, I have places to go to.
Although on that note, I've been trying to brainstorm reasons why I'd look forward to being 21. So far I have GETTING CRUNK WOOO being able to eat at Hemingway's or being able to get into F&F early then place your order as soon as half-price starts.
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| Bones fic: he Note |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|08:40 pm] |
She was out of the hospital. Finally. This day seemed not to end. His fears seemed not to end. From the moment he felt her missing, he had this nausea and anger in the stomach. The nausea was because he was scared to lose her; The anger because he was scared to lose her. He was scared to lose her. To lose her. Temperance. Her. After they were dig up, they were taken to an ambulance. Angela went with Hodgins and he went with Brennan. She hadn’t let go of his hand since it took her out of the gravel. The electricity seemed to keep flowing between their bodies. After the check-up, they had to stay in observation for a few hours. Then Booth brought her home. She was so groggy he carried her home. He hadn’t left his car in 5 hours, scared of leaving her front door out of sight. He was falling asleep. He fought the urge to close his eyelids, scared of what might happen if he let go of the security he was giving her. She would hate him to worry this much. He needed to protect her. He was a knight in shining FBI armour. That was his job. Protect her. He wouldn’t fail. When he woke up, he found papers on his windshield. One was all dirty and the other one was a plain white envelope. He unfolded both of them getting back in the SUV. He first read the dirty one. It had his name on it. ‘If you read this I’m dead. If you read this, tell Angela I love her. If you read this, please know you were one of the most precious things I ever had t own, because face it, I own you, I am a genius. If you read this, I am sorry for the pain. If you read this, know that I will always love you. Thanks for what you did. You are the best knight in shining FBI armour a distressed lady could have. If you read this, sorry that I am not there to tell you this in person. Bones’ She signed Bones. It was the letter she wrote when she was in the car with Hodgins. She loved him. She owned him. She loved him. He then opened the envelope. It held a key and a card. ‘Rule 1: No reading my manuscript. Rule 2: I sleep in the left side of the bed. Rule 3: Do not loose the key of my apartment. Rule 4: You make breakfast on weekends.’ He smiled. He got out of the car and got to her apartment. When he got in with his own key, he went in the bedroom. She was sleeping. He got in his boxers and joined her in bed. On the right side. She turned around and put her head on his chest. “Don’t move, I need sleep.” She said, almost in a whisper. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|05:38 pm] |
Icons
[01|40]Robert & Kristen (Vanity Fair)
[41|60]Kristen Stewart
[61|75]Ashley Greene
[76|90]Robert Pattinson (Vanity Fair)
[91|125]Gossip Girl (3d season)
[126|141]Harry Potter Cast
[142|160]Stock
  
Love will tear us apart.
here at heimweh26 |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|05:36 pm] |
Icons
[01|40]Robert & Kristen (Vanity Fair)
[41|60]Kristen Stewart
[61|75]Ashley Greene
[76|90]Robert Pattinson (Vanity Fair)
[91|125]Gossip Girl (3d season)
[126|141]Harry Potter Cast
[142|160]Stock
Love will tear us apart.
here at heimweh26 |
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| Roncast |
[Nov. 3rd, 2009|10:17 am] |
Good Morning R/Hr people!
This summer I started a podcast called Roncast for ICM. It's an hour of Ron focused discussion, ranging from his relationships to his portrayal in the films. You can listen to it here.
During the show, there is a segment focusing on Ron and Hermione. This month's show is devoted to their relationship in the end of PS/SS and all of CoS. My personal moment of Ron and Hermione realization happened in CoS so I can't wait to do this part!
I also like to have non-regular hosts join us for discussions to keep the show interesting. Would any of you shippers be interested in being on the podcast to talk with us about Ron and Hermione in this time frame? You can join us for almost the whole discussion if you would like!
Send me a message if you are interested and I'll give you details.
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| My dog now looks at me sadly and with bad intent all in one.... |
[Nov. 3rd, 2009|10:05 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | living room | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  good | ] |
| [ | music |
| | silence is golden, golden! | ] |
Hi er'body!
Well, it has been a busy couple weeks weeks here I will say that. I was all excited about Halloween and trick or treaters, every place I have lived (not including my parent's house) there were no kiddies to wander around and harass people for candy so I thought I might get a chance this year what with living in a house in a neighborhood and such. So, I went out and bought a fair amount of candy, dressed up in my fakey Renaissance outfit and waited with the door pen so light could shine out as we have no outside porch light here. Well, I at least got 10 people! So, a slow start, but it made me happy to pass out candy.
I have had papers and projects coming up fast and furious the last few weeks also with midterms and everything else too. I just turned in a paper yesterday for my preservation class and the week before it was a paper for my intro to archives class. Whew! Next up are more papers for the class I hate (intro to information, designing a webpage as a project for the tech class, a final paper that should end up being around 20 pages for preservation and a lit review for archives as well as finals for some of these classes. I just need to schedule our time to remember to work on these more long term thingies so I don't lose sight of them and then freak out cuz they are due tomorrow or something.
We are really low on money this month already and we are only 3 days into it. That is because my car insurance decided to go up for no apparent reason and then go up even more because I didn't fill out some crap paper work special to Pennsylvania and so the bumped me up to having to pay maximum everything, which I called and bitched about and got those finally taken down (it was like 350 minimum payment this month or something) to the 75 a month minimum i have to ay now, which is silly to me as i was only paying 0 a month in Virginia and I haven't had any accidents or anything to raise my coverage...just moved to a crappy state for car insurance I guess.
Also, our landlord finally sent us a water bill. We were actually receiving them here but they were addressed to him and so we had to hand them off to him...and he just puts a photo copy in our mailbox and expects us to send the money to him instead of the water company...again some weird crap with Pennsylvania laws or whatever. So, we have our first one after being in this house since the end of July. yah.
Also, Daisy has an ear infection that has gotten really bad. We were trying to clean it out every day in hopes that it might just kinda go away (it has in the past) but no go. It is the worst one she has had so we took her to the vet yesterday to have it checked out. They refused to prescribe her meds until they saw her in a visit (35 bucks) and then they insisted on running a test on the junk that is built up in there to make sure it was the same kind of infection she has always gotten (another 35 bucks) and finally prescribed her some ear meds (another 35 bucks) so we can get her all happy and pink eared again. All in all, it was 110 dollars that we prolly needed for gas money, food, and bills that we had to give up yesterday for the dog. I just wish we were able to get the meds without the entire ordeal of everything else and them squeezing us for more money. they want to see her next week, which will not happen as I am not going to pay another 35 bucks for them to say whether her ear infection is still here or not, I can make that observation on my own for free, thanks.
So we have come to the conclusion that I need to fit in some part time work somewhere probably on Tuesdays and Sundays to help bring in a little more cash to pay for things. Every other day of the week I either have class or am volunteering down at the Heinz History Center Archives which I need to do because I wasn't able to get an internship through Pitt anywhere because I signed up too late for the program. I need to have experience so I can get a job down the line, you know?
So yah. I do like all the walking and stuff I have been doing though. I have been trying to take the stairs in my school building and parking farther away and walking to where ever. I also have been trying to bring back my little dance parties I used to have in High School where I would turn on the radio when I got home and dance around the living for an hour or so... it is good fun, cheap, exorcise...
Anyway, I have blah blahed for too long and now much venture over to look at lolcats and go "aaawwww" |
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